Stifle
All my life I've calmed one thing or another
SANDRA ALCOSSER
The mare smells my fear.
I shut it off.
Precaution blanches even the deepest violets
over time. I have avoided things that rage:
high tides, the faithful, passion.
What is replaced when I absorb
the worries of others? Rotting timber
appears sound but its insides powder like bone meal.
I only grow more delicate
with my refusals to break.
I wrap my arms around things that shake.
I am the last thing the broken bird sees before it dies.
The doctor says my cold hands and feet
are signs of dread.
What is scarier than self-deprivation?
When someone stops loving me.
What is calm is hollow
of movement and sound.
I hope I do not grow too invisible
to know my own face.
The horse carries the ghost of a woman
through the wet wood.
All my life I've calmed one thing or another
SANDRA ALCOSSER
The mare smells my fear.
I shut it off.
Precaution blanches even the deepest violets
over time. I have avoided things that rage:
high tides, the faithful, passion.
What is replaced when I absorb
the worries of others? Rotting timber
appears sound but its insides powder like bone meal.
I only grow more delicate
with my refusals to break.
I wrap my arms around things that shake.
I am the last thing the broken bird sees before it dies.
The doctor says my cold hands and feet
are signs of dread.
What is scarier than self-deprivation?
When someone stops loving me.
What is calm is hollow
of movement and sound.
I hope I do not grow too invisible
to know my own face.
The horse carries the ghost of a woman
through the wet wood.